The Important Stuff

I've been thinking a lot about priorities when it comes to wedding planning. Most planning sites tell you to decide what's important to you when it comes to budgeting so you don't blow your whole budget on cake or something (unless your priority is cake!).

I'll be the first to admit, Mr. Hyena and I did not think about what our budget priorities are. I knew I wanted fabulous pictures, but I wasn't willing to spend several thousands of dollars on them. I knew I wanted fabulous food, but with a limited budget, we couldn't afford to pay for four-course meals for everyone we wanted to celebrate with us. Actually, I want fabulous everything, but I am a prime example of champagne taste but too-cheap-for-anything-including-sometimes-beer budget. (Seriously. I order water at restaurants 99% of the time, because it's free. Hyena Sis thinks I'm nuts.)

The things that ARE important to me don't seem to come with price tags. It's important to me to personalize when at all possible, and come up with creative ways to execute the traditional wedding "stuff." I really, REALLY wanted to design our invitation suite, instead of hiring someone to design them, even if it meant they weren't going to be letter-pressed or fancy. It's really important that I spend time with my friends and family leading up to the wedding. It was really important that we get married in a church, and that whoever marries us actually KNOWS us as a couple. It was important to me to not spend a ridiculous amount of money on one day, because even though this is a very important day (and one that I'm sure will be one of the best days ever because I get to marry such a hottie ^_^), it IS only one day in the end. I feel wasteful and spoiled having the opportunity to spend so much money at one time.

So what does this mean for all the "stuff"?

We're having artificial flowers. I'm 100 percent okay with that. In fact, I'm excited about it, because it will provide an opportunity for me to spend time with the women in my family as we work on putting together the bouquets and boutonnieres.

We'll be throwing an iPod reception, because music is something Mr. H and I are both decently good at working with, and we didn't want to skimp on a DJ and be disappointed. I worked the iPod at Bridesmaid A's wedding, and she offered to do the same for mine.

We're going to have an hors d'oeuvres buffet at our afternoon reception and invite everyone to stick around and eat dinner at the local restaurants around our venue so we can spend more time with them (if they aren't totally stuffed from the hors d'oeuvres ... our caterer is FABULOUS. More on that later!).

Our wedding will be beautiful.

To Veil or Not to Veil? Good Question.

Before I went dress shopping, I had decided that I didn't want a veil. I've always liked birdcage veils, but I wasn't sure I could pull one off. I didn't like the look of most regular veils, because I like to think I'm non-traditional and I didn't want anything covering up my face and/or getting in the way.

At the dress boutique, Sales Teenager tried to put a veil on my head when I came out in dress #1. I told her, no thank you, I don't want a veil. Bridesmaid J said, "Miss Hyena, when else in your life are you going to get to wear a veil? You have to have one!" Fine. I conceded and let them put veils on my head.

She was right. The veil made everything look more complete. I made an "Aaaaah I'm a bride!!!!" face at J and purchased the one that matched the beading in my dress.

I picked up my veil a while ago, so I paraded it around for Mom Hyena and tried to figure out how I should wear it, how I should wear my hair, and exactly what level of awesome my decision to get a veil was (Wicked Awesome, thankyouverymuch!).

I'd like to have my hair half-up, so here are my options for the veil. (Tyra, call me! I could be the next top model!)

On the back of the head, right where my hair would be pulled back:

Directly on top of my head. This was where Sales Teenager placed it, and it looked fine, but when I put it on myself, it looks dumb. Maybe it's crooked? But of course, I will have help the day of.

I think I'm leaning toward the first option. What do you think?

(Obi-Wan picture from here. All other pictures personal.)

A Dress Story

Snow Love

Bridesmaid J, my college roomie, has dabbled in photography for years. In fact, a few years ago, she shot Bridesmaid A's wedding! Since she's in my bridal party, she couldn't do our photography, but we did get her to do our engagement portraits!

After college, J moved to Hong Kong, so we had to wait for a time she would be back in Texas in order to shoot them. As luck would have it, she was in the country for parts of January and February 2010, and it was the same week that it snowed OVER A FOOT. In Texas. Score! She did a beautiful job shooting them, and I am so pumped to share some of my faves.

My engagement ring and Matt's Aggie ring.

The next time we'll see J is the week of my wedding (sad!), but I'm so excited that she got to participate in this part of the wedding! She also got to help me shop for my wedding dress later that day ... stay tuned!

All photos by Bridemaid J.

Dancing with my father

I love to dance. I took dance lessons from age 5 until college, where I decided I couldn't live without it, so I took tap classes for a couple semesters.

My dad ... well, he didn't share my enthusiasm for dancing. He dreaded going to me and my sister's dance recitals every year (no worries, I totally understand. Sitting and watching something you don't enjoy for four hours every year for 14 years is PAINFUL, so way to go H-Dad for being there anyway!).

Because of this, I am pretty sure I have never once in my life danced with my dad. Not only that, but I'm pretty sure we have nothing musical in common. He listens to hard rock from the '70s, mainly, which is pretty much the only genre I'm not interested in.

The only song in his musical library I can remember liking when I was a kid is Led Zeppelin's "Lemon Song," but I just looked up the lyrics, and they are NOT appropriate, and will NOT be making an appearance at the wedding!

Get those boys some haircuts!

(source)

When I mentioned doing a father-daughter dance – because that's what you do, not because I really was looking forward to it – I don't think H-Dad was that into the idea. I know it's tradition, and Mr. Hyena wants to do a mother-son dance, but it feels like it's forcing an awkwardness that H-Dad and I just don't have. We're close, but a different kind of close. We enjoy going on walks together and talking hot-button issues. Can we go on a wedding walk instead?

John Cleese's Ministry of Silly Walks!

So what to do, what to do?  It was a long shot, but I went through the entire discographies of Led Zeppelin and The Who to see if there were any songs that could be even REMOTELY construed as a potential father-daughter song. If your dad is like mine, save yourself the trouble — there's not. So I turned to my darling fiancé.

"Mr. Hyenaaaaaaa ... I can't find a song to dance with my dad to!"

"So then don't do one if you don't want to."

"But you wanted to dance with your mom."

"Just because there's not an official dance doesn't mean I won't have the chance."

Have I ever mentioned I have the best fiancé ever?! As long as he's happy with this arrangement, I'm happy too. So I called H-Dad and offered this suggestion, and he was pleased. Now my dad doesn't have to dance, we don't have to find a song, and it'll be more of an "us" wedding. I don't really like the idea of doing something merely for tradition's sake when there's nothing personal about it, and now I don't have to.

Does your dad have different taste in music than you?